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'“If I’m Dyin’, I’m Lyin’ ”' is an episode from the FOX animated television series ''Family Guy''. It was produced for season one but aired in season two. Guest starring Martin Mull as Mr. Harris and Fred Tatasciore as Chevy Chase.

Contents

Plot summary

Cultural references

Trivia

References

Plot summary

Peter becomes very upset when NBC cancels his favorite show—''Gumbel 2 Gumbel''—an action drama starring brothers Bryant Gumbel and Greg Gumbel. Lois suggests he use the series’ cancellation to help Chris improve his study habits. To get the show back on the air, Peter decides to tell the “Grant-a-Dream” Foundation (a parody of the Make-a-Wish Foundation) that being able to watch the show is Chris’s dying wish. To this end, he makes up a disease called “tumasyphilisitisosis,” the symptoms of which include growing extra nipples (actually pepperoni slices) across one’s torso. (Peter eats two of them, to the disgust of the Grant-a-Dream agent.)
An agreement is brokered between Grant-a-Dream and NBC in which the Gumbel show will be put back on the air if NBC can get the film rights to Chris’s death. Peter is overjoyed with ''Gumbel 2 Gumbel'' is back on the air, but he panics upon learning that mourners are holding a candlelit vigil on their front lawn. When the network comes to claim their part of the deal, Lois finds out about the scam and tells Peter to tell the truth, but he could possibly face prison time for fraud. Acting out of desperation, he casually claims to have cured him and gets off the hook. Thus Peter gets a reputation for being a healer, and people start worshipping him as a god. Infuriated, the real God sends six plagues upon his house. When Chris is crushed by a giant golden statue of Peter during the final plague (death of the firstborn son), Peter admits that he is not God, thus ending the plagues and saving Chris’ life.

Cultural references

★ Peter writes a letter to try and save the show ''Coach'', referencing Craig T. Nelson in the letter.

★ In one scene, ''Hollywood Squares'' is parodied with its celebrity guests LL Cool J, Charles Grodin, Fran Drescher, Scott Bakula, Whoopi Goldberg, Suzanne Somers, Dennis Rodman and Betty White. The comical attitude of Hollywood Squares was caught in the episode too, the host asks the sick kid if there is anything lower than absolute zero, and he says “my white cell count.” The sick kid, Jeremy, would later appear in the episodes ''Mr. Saturday Knight'' and ''Stuck Together, Torn Apart''.

★ A sign outside NBC’s Studio reads “We Used to Have ''Seinfeld'', Remember?”

★ In the NBC boardroom, one of the executives dismisses an idea as “the same crap over and over” and suggests that they “take a chance” and “do something fresh,” to which the dissident is beaten with a ''Just Shoot Me!'' poster.

★ Peter’s black cousin Rufus Griffin had starred in many movies called ''Caddyblack'', ''Blackdraft'', and ''Black Kramer vs. Kramer''. These are parodies of the movies ''Caddyshack'', ''Backdraft'', and ''Kramer vs Kramer'', respectively (as well as a reference to the way that the title of ''Dracula'' was modified to make the title of ''Blacula'').

★ At one point, Peter apologizes to Chris, stating that “This isn’t the first time my appetite’s gotten me in trouble.” The scene cuts to a parody of the film ''The Diary of Anne Frank'' during the Nazi infiltration of the house in which the Frank family was hiding. The clip suggests the reason the Franks were discovered was because Peter was hiding with them, eating potato chips obnoxiously loud.

★ In a cutaway, ''Back to the Future'' is spoofed with Peter’s black cousin, Rufus Griffin in a blaxploitation film called ''Black to the Future''. The De Lorean time machine, meeting up with his teenager mother, and performing at the school dance are spoofed in the scene. The Chuck Berry phone call during the dance is replaced with the band member calling Isaac Hayes instead.

★ The popular 1970s sitcom ''Good Times'' is parodied in a scene where Florida Evans is upset that she’s named after a U.S. State. J.J.’s infamous “Dy-No-Mite” is also implemented.

★ After Chris shows signs of boils, one of the ten Plagues of Egypt, one of the names Peter said kids used to call him was “Rootin’ Tootin’ Raspberry.” This is a reference to the popular ''Pillsbury'' Funny Face Drink flavour.

★ Stewie is excited when the bathtub water turns to blood and compares it to the blood of Mr. Bubble.

★ In the scene where Peter is pleading to God, he mentions he says “I’m just a big fake, like the Moon Landing, and Marky Mark’s hog in ''Boogie Nights''. And Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman—I don't mean that completely untrue gay rumor, they’re just both really phony.” These are references to the Apollo Moon Landing hoax accusations, Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman’s marriage (at the time of the episode’s original airing they were still married), and to the ending to ''Boogie Nights'' in which Wahlberg’s character Dirk Diggler pulls out his long penis.

Trivia

★ In June 2003, Igor Smykov sued the Russian television channel REN TV on claims that ''Family Guy'', along with ''The Simpsons'', were "morally degenerate and promoted drugs, violence and homosexuality." As evidence, "If I'm Dyin', I'm Lyin'" was shown to the judge to prove that ''Family Guy'' showed a dysfunctional family, and thus should not be aired again on the channel. The case was thrown out after one day.[1]

References

★ S. Callaghan, “If I’m Dyin’, I’m Lyin’.” ''Family Guy: The Official Episode Guide Seasons 1–3''. New York: HarperCollins, 2005. 74–77.

★ A. Delarte, “Nitpicking Family Guy: Season 2” in ''Bob’s Poetry Magazine'', 2.May 2005: 15–16 http://bobspoetry.com/Bobs02My.pdf